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Choco McShreddy
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Vital statistics
Title
Gender
Race
Faction The United Federation of the F40PH
Health none
Level 0
Status No
Location fagland

Choco McShreddy is a character from Whales in a really cool sitcom called real life, you should watch it some time. He sucks at making Wiki pages, but made this one regardless. He has been into furry porn for about 10 years and 10 months now, which makes him a pretty cool guy who doesn't afraid of anything. He is the purveyor of sweet glasses and hobo hairstyles, as well as music and cults, not to toot his own horn of course. There are plenty cooler than him, but it's really hard to ever get a good say about yourself, especially seeing as this will be a troll target hours after it's completion (love you too choco, no hard feelings). He does English whores, Classics and Media, he dropped Psychology because the subject is for homos. He has an interest in Classical Civilisations, Jazz, Fine Arts, Wine and cool glasses. He also has a notorious dislike for Laundromats, the motherfuckers.

The Quest Begins... Edit

In The Beginning... Edit

He was given a sword by his mentor in the mountain of Whales, where he learnt the fine art of gold farming. Which is funny because he actually practices lightsaber-fighting on the occasion. He was the best of his kind in any way possible ever, it was undoubtedly the dawn of a very bright era for him. Anyway, he then found a computer and ditched everything to play vidya gaems and stuff like that. Now he keeps an even mix between the online world and the online world. It was until college that his activity in the online world became a bit hindered by the amount of work that is to be put into stuff like that (none).

And Then... Edit

He discovered some Asian bitch that I would totally fucking plow. She was a friend of his friend's, I think, but damn when he (<---nice fail with your jap tranny) sent me pictures I painted my wall white. And they weren't even fucking nudes. Maybe I have a thing for Japanese chicks. Shit, my third grade teacher was Korean and I'd even plow her. Though, most Asians are kinky (See: Darklight), and would pretty much do anything sexually related. After all, Japan IS the place where anime was born. Damn, I really got off topic, didn't I? Oh, by the w ay, do you commonly place the fingers of your left hand over the WASD and SHIFT keys? I didn't notice I did until a friend of mine mentioned he did too. I was like, hot damn, that's some crazy shit. And another friend of mine has to go to Washington D.C. for the first week of September, so sucks to be him. Fucking nig-nog. I wonder what else I can fit here.... Oh, I'm playing through Dead Space again. Right now I have to go to the morgue to get some codes from the captain of the planet crusher, I think it's called, which requires me to go through the operating room. Right before the operating room, though, there's a lounge area with a lot of graffiti, one of which reads "WE'RE ALL FUCKED!" and right next to that, a bit smaller, it reads "Hey, it's not always a bad thing to be fucked." I laughed a bit at that, then my grandfather came in and I had to go. I was like FFFFFF because now I'm not going to be able to head back to where I was until later tonight, since I have to actually talk to people now. Wait, how did I do all of this while talking? Oh well. I'm gonna go back to dicking around and not playing Dead Space.

Next ThursdayEdit

Choco came back to edit more of his Wiki article and

noticed that there was more text than when he had originally left. Curiously, he searched through his Steam messages and soon found the following:

Beardsly: I HATH TOUCHED YOUR PAGE AGAIN

Knowing exactly what had happened, Choco quickly ran back outside to his private manor garden, grabbing his cup of tea on the way, and promptly took a mouthful of tea and spat it out of his mouth at his glorious flowers raising his arms to the sky and spilling some of the tea onto his face, yelling, "DAMN YOU, CLINT CLINTON!" The words were very long, much longer than I could type with text. He stood there for a couple more hours, before realizing he had boiling hot tea on his face, and knew he had to undergo a facial. He quickly poured himself more tea and drank it before running backwards out of his house, with his business suit on backwards as well so it looked like he was running forward, and ran off to the local Starbucks, to get a handjob.

The Quest Continues, doing flips and shit... Edit

Evil-agent-smith

The asian chick Choco likes.

Several milliseconds passed since Choco went to Starbucks. When he requested a handjob, the woman there reported that there was nothing there to jerk. Displeased, Choco walked out of the Starbucks with a glum look on his face and set off to remember what the fuck he was doing. I think it may have had something to do with a moose. Damn, could you imagine if it did? I'd be like fucking the Oracle, but not a nigger nor fat nor ugly nor woman. Speaking of which, why the fuck is she baking cookies 24/7? I mean, honestly, you can read the future. Why not go out and strike it rich, live in a mansion with all of your multicultural kids and their lack of spoons with security guards to keep faggots like Agent Smith out. Fucking idiot, and how retarded do you have to be to start randomly laughing after you take over somebody's body? And that face was jew, blah. I'm trying to pull up an image so you know what I'm talking about, but my tab is fucking lagging. Hold on, gimme a moment or two... Ha! My master plan worked! All right, the picture should be somewhere. Fuck Agent Smith in his tight ass hole. The image is way up there for now until I decide to copy this so I can restart the browser and pull the image down here. Anyway, that's what I was talking about, now where were we? Oh right, so the Joker allowed himself to get captured so he could take control of Arkham Asylum and all of the loonytoons there. Batman, being the fucktard he is, decides he has to go there to kick the Joker's ass and continue to fuck him up the a- Wait, this isn't X-Play? Fuck, I gotta stop day dreaming. Uhhh... Hmm.... Oh wait, so Jack Skellington (What a gay name) is now gonna be a Raggedy-Ann doll in the movie 9. Movie looks pretty good so I'm definately gonna see it. I also wanna see District 9001. Maybe I have a thing for the number 9. Hmm, who knows? Wait, how the fuck did I get here? This isn't a fucking blog, this is a Wikipedia article. Well, a Wikia article. Oh, by the way, is it pronounced wikEpEdEah or wikIpEdEah, because my freshman biology teacher kept calling it WikIpedia rather than Wikipedia. Stupid bitch. Oh, and since Agent Smith feels like being a gay nigger, I'll leave him up there until somebody feels like moving it down here. OLOLOLOL NVM I DID IT.

The Quest Ends... Edit

40 ABY Edit

It had been fourty years since the first Death Star had been destroyed. Choco finally found that moose he was looking to fuck, but it turned him down so it could go flying around the world with some squirrel named Rocky. Choco returned home, where the YouTube Civil War had taken place. Choco bawww'd himself to sleep that night, waking up to the sound of his computer humming. He looked up at the moniter and saw the answer to all of his problems, a quest guide for RuneScape. Choco quickly signed into his account "69Miner49er" and began doing all of the quests he could, which were only the free quests because he's too poor to afford a Members account. Upon finishing the Dragon Slayer quest, he had completed his life goal. To put on over nine thousand pounds of pure body fat. Satisfied, he called the crane company to pick him up and take him to the bathroom so he could shit all of the fat out. Unfortunately, the crane broke under his immense weight, and he was doomed to be a fat-fuck for all eternity. The British government, not wanting the world to know they gave birth to such a fat fuck, sent fourteen hundred Chinook helicopters to air-lift Choco out of his house and to Ethiopia, hoping the niggers would consume any evidence of his being British.

Beardsly's ContriFAILbution Edit

Dyslexia Edit

liysDexia is a diesaes ersulitng in difcifutlys in raedign, wirtign and spenligl, sa wlel sa soemtiems infleuncign shrot-trem mermoy, mahtemitasc, concetnartoin, persalno hyegien and sqeuencign. The medacil trem for oen who sufefrs from dylsexai is "a big spaz".

Ferqulenty cliamed as an excuse by ploepe on the intrenet hwo:

  • cantno splel becusea all thye raed aer Livejournal etrines by ohter trads hwo slimiarly cantno splel, or becusea thye aer two Riltaiend too hit kyes in teh crorcet order; and/or
  • dindt bothre to raed whevtaer sauce post thye aer repsondign too - noet that thiis is an unusaul usgae, becusea mots ploepe thnik dylsexai is awl abuot splelign.

RIL ilsdexiks otfan uz thire codnison az un exquz for been jurkz ur havn no sence ov humr.

Dylsexci ploepe shluod not meak websiets.

The onyl knwon crue for dylsexai is a lagre bwol of alhpaebt suop.

If I cna raed this, am I dsylexic? Edit

Althuo yuo kan raed msot of ths stoff evin thuo it is wrung raely all yuo naed is teh firzt and last luttars of ani givan wurd. If that's nut enuf u kan uz a fonetik sistm two red ur wurds. In aul onesti teh onli peopl who kant red dis R Kumplete phucktardz Comnolmy a plorbem for 16 yaer old grils btu theyer idwarwo tiyye??

PROOFE? http://www.snopes.com/language/apocryph/cambridge.asp

L33t H4X0r? Edit

Popel wiv lydixia shid nut b miztakan for leet hazorz bekuz tehy no fuk all abutt tarslating leat intro Egnliz. Althou itz nott liek taht evar sopped temh form pretandin.

Finished Edit

And that is Beardsly's contribution to this page.

BEARDSLY IS A FAGGOT SO HIS CONTRIBUTION IS GAY

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